We ate dinner in silence in the living room at about six o’clock. We turned the channel to a movie that was playing on TV since dad doesn’t like Supernatural. We agreed on The American President since it was something we could both enjoy. The movie had already begun so we missed the beginning, but we didn’t mind; we have seen this together several times so it wasn’t new to us. Michael Douglas and Annette Bening are always wonderful in this movie every time I watch it with dad.
We finish eating our dinner before the movie ends. Dad takes our dishes and washes them before kissing my forehead and going upstairs into his office. I can’t imagine going into that room after last night, but he seems intent on cleaning everything up right away. I wonder if he has taken care of the blood stain yet…I stay on the couch until the movie ends. I always loved it and didn’t want to stop in the middle.
By the time I turn off the TV to go upstairs, it’s nine o’clock. I gather my pillows and blanket, and tuck my cell phone under my arm before ascending the stairs. I’m a little wobbly on my way up; I have to take each step slowly to make sure that I don’t get dizzy and fall back down the stairs. I don’t need to kill more brain cells. I’m careful and sluggish, but I am able to make it to my room without calling for dad to help me. I notice the light coming from underneath the door to his office and feel a little safer being upstairs tonight. The lights on will always reassure me that he’s home and not some stranger breaking in.
I shut the door behind me and place everything back on my bed, laying my phone on my nightstand next to my alarm clock, along with Eli’s CD. I take a peek out the window and see that his light is off in his room, but there are faint, flickering lights inside coming from what I assume is a TV playing something or other. I just smile thinking about what kind of day tomorrow is going to be and what might happen.
I turn to my nightstand and grab the CD before walking over to my computer and placing it the disc drive. My nerves return a little, as I wait for the computer to read the CD and load the tracks onto Windows Media Player. It recognizes 15 different tracks on the CD but couldn’t find the names so they are just labeled by track number. I turn my speakers on but make sure they aren’t loud enough to disturb dad. This was something I wanted to experience on my own.
I listened to each song in its entirety before going to the next. It was a very strange array of music but I enjoyed every song. There are uplifting songs, rock songs, classic songs, foreign songs, mellow songs, depressing songs, and funny songs. I’m relieved that he hadn’t put any love songs into the mix. I like this kid a lot already, but it would have been weird finding romantic songs on a mix CD he gave me the first time we talked to each other. It would take more than staring at each other and him giving me music for me to gain my full trust. However, this was definitely a good start. I was able to label the songs myself and entered the names and artists as each song played. Google was very helpful as far as finding artists for the songs I don’t know.
- Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas
- Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana
- Sober by Kelly Clarkson
- Vincent (Starry, Starry Night) by Josh Groban
- Tainted Love by Soft Cell
- We Will Rock You by Queen
- Until The End by Breaking Benjamin
- Hear Me by Kelly Clarkson
- Weight of the World by Evanescence
- Mai by Josh Groban
- Forget it by Breaking Benjamin
- Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen
- Riot by Three Days Grace
14.Tourniquet by Evanescence
- Love Somebody by Maroon 5
I can’t help but smile while I listen to the songs. One by one I go through the tracks, taking my time listening to the lyrics and taking in the beat. It amazes me that he was able to find so many different artists and songs that I enjoy, while others I am definitely going to have to look up and see what other songs I would like by them. They had meaning to me and yet some of them didn’t have any meaning at all and were just fun to listen to. It took me almost an hour to finish the disc, and oddly enough the last song is a sort of love song: Love Somebody by Maroon 5, but I didn’t read into it. The rest of the CD kept me from believing it was anything more than just a friendly gesture.
I want to listen to the whole disc again but I’m too tired to stay up another hour to finish and hear all the songs again. I feel almost relaxed after listening to it, even with some of the more energetic and heavy songs on the CD. I have to give Eli credit; he definitely has some sort of sixth sense for music.
Sleepiness set in so I shut my laptop and get up, making my way to the bathroom for a much needed shower. I felt grimy and dirty from not showering all day. I shut the door behind me and grab a towel from the closet to the right of the doorway and set it on top of the toilet for when I finish. I turn on the water and make sure the water is coming out of the shower-head instead of the faucet and let it warm up.
I undress carefully to make sure the pressure in my head doesn’t interrupt the good feeling I have. I test the water with my fingers before climbing into the shower. The water is perfect; hot enough to loosen the knots in my muscles, but not hot enough to scald me. I wet my hair and let the water wash away my tension before cleaning myself up. I don’t think about anything, the water relaxing me and keeping my mind clear of everything. I don’t have to worry about anything in the shower. It was my place to get away and really relax when I couldn’t do that on the roof. A wonderfully warm shower always did the trick.
After 30 minutes my hands were pruney and my body felt normal again. I turned the water off and grabbed the towel, drying myself off before wrapping the towel around my body and walking back to my room; always closing the door behind me. I grab clean pajamas out of my dresser and put them on before turning the light off, and getting comfortable in bed.
Thoughts of Eli drift into my head as I lay with my eyes closed. This guy seems to be really nice and sweet, but hasn’t talked to anyone but me. I wonder what he’s thinking about as he lays in his room. Is it of me? Why hasn’t he talked to anyone else in school? He seems perfect so far – confident, handsome, kind – but there is something a little off about him, too. No one is perfect so there has to be something wrong with him, right? Maybe I just want there to be since I’m not used to a boy giving me any attention the way he has.
My mind then switches gears to dad. What did he have to grab from the office that was so important he stayed out until the wee hours of the morning to get? Was it the same thing that the person who attacked me was looking for?
I pushed the negative thoughts away. Dad had taken care of me today and already felt bad for not being there for me. I didn’t need to cause myself more stress after how long it took me just to relax. Dark thoughts like that will only bring back the anxiety and fear.
With the thoughts successfully pushed to the back of my mind, I’m finally able to drift off into a somewhat restful sleep. I dream about school and my fellow students laughing at me and the bump on my head, about walking in on Dad and Paulette in his office, and about mom still being in the house and spending time with her. I tossed and turned a little when the affair came up, but otherwise I spent the night in peaceful sleep.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.
My digital alarm clock wakes me up at 8am. I turn it off and lay there. It’s chilly outside so it’s difficult to get out of bed this morning. I reluctantly push the covers back and crawl out of bed in search of my slippers. I find them in the closet and go to the bathroom. Everyone has to pee first thing in the morning.
I open the door and look to my left where dad’s office sits. His door is still closed but I can’t tell if the light is on or not. I walk over to the door quietly and open it slightly. Dad is laying on the futon, fast asleep, and the lamp on the table behind him is on. He must have fallen asleep while looking over a case file because I can see paperwork on his chest as well as the folder it probably belonged to.